Frances's Love Letters

So What Does Faith Have To Do With Finding The Right Man To Marry?

My fellow single men and ladies,

How una dey?
Me? I dey fine oh, just been thinking a bit about how almost all my conversations with people end.
Almost all of them end with the other people saying “oya go find that kain man na”.

What kind of man you think?
Well, when I say my man won’t cheat on me, they say – “oya go find that kain man na”.
When I say my man will be like Lapidoth who wasn’t threatened by Deborah’s sucess and allowed her to be a judge in a country, they say – “oya go find that kain man na”.
When I say he will be a man who believes in no sex before marriage, a man who fears God through and through and preserves my body in purity, they say – “oya go find that kain man na”



I cross my heart, the things I say I expect my man to be/do are not over the top things, they are just stuff that arise out of being a man that fears God….
And to be honest, when they say “oya go find that kain man na”, it does shake me up a bit… but I figure, if I can use my faith in God to trust Him for a job, then why not use that same faith to trust God for an ama-mazing marriage?

Aha! So what do I do with the “oya go find that kain man na” talks?
I shut their voices and tune into God’s voice in me, into the word of God and into the amazing Christian marriages that I see around me.
And I write, oh, I write love letters to God and I tell Him that I trust Him. I tell Him that I know He knows all about me already and that He is setting things in place.
I tell Him that I know He is writing my love story and I’ll trust Him. He knows all anyway so I trust Him.
And guess what? He replies back! Hehe.
He tells me to chill. That He is working behind the scenes. That things will all come together IN HIS TIME. He tells me to WORRY NOT.
And He tells me I should just get my relationship right with Him and when I do, there’s no way I won’t also get my marital relationship right also.

So my fellow single men and ladies, howfar? Have you gotten your relationship right with God?
A lot of the worries won’t be there if you let God lead. If you chose to trust Him and have faith in Him.
Stop stressing/worrying about your marital future. Leave it all in the hands of God. He specializes in giving the best you know. He specializes in giving “that kain man/woman that people think don’t exist”.
Put your faith to work in getting the spouse of your dreams.
No more crying yourself to sleep you hear?
No more bitching about lack of “that kain man” to your friends.
When you anyone says “oya go find that kain man” to you, just do what I do…
Smile at the naysayers, and do cartwheels in your head for what your faith in God will do for your marital future.
And know that your marital life and future will be used by God to shine the light to others soon. It will be used to let others know that trusting God in the aspect of relationships and marriages is not in vain.

Step up the faith.
Stop cowering in the fear of terrible marriages all around.
Hold unto God, hold unto His word for you tightly.
He is still in the business of writing love stories.
He is still in the business of writing your love story.
He is still in the business of writing love stories that will bring glory to His name.
Don’t shortchange your faith, use it in this all important area of your life.
Young Christian folks will refer to your story as an encouragement in trusting God for great spouses someday…soon.
It will glorify God!

And speaking of faith, I’ve gotten my wig and gown for call to bar already oh, even though results have not been released. Hehe. I nor dey play, my success is sure already, I’m just waiting for physical manifestation.


Mr aYiOr_500634


2014 Law School graduates, you wanna faith it with me?
You can get the Greenfield wig and gown like I did. Great texture and e nor go quick tear like some gown wey we see some lawyers wear during our externship (I didn’t say anything oh.)
Just holla at these numbers- 080-61275002,7BBEFB4F,25F018A2,070-3531-6554 or buy online at


I do hope I’ve recruited some faith filled singles on this journey of trusting God for “the one” for us sha?
Like always, I heart you all.
Till I write to you next time,
With lots of love,

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  • Reply
    October 11, 2014 at 9:23 am

    Mmmm…food for thought

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 11, 2014 at 7:32 pm

      Glad it made you think Ruth.. just act on the positive gotten..thanks for stopping by dear

  • Reply
    Efe Harriet
    October 11, 2014 at 9:24 am

    Funny its so true, he is still in the business of love letters. Having that faith that your spouse would be different takes alot but it is achievable. As per the wig n gown, I key into your faith

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 11, 2014 at 7:31 pm

      Yeah Efe, faith in God takes a lot to keep alive but the results are soooo worth it, so I’ll/we should invest in it time and time again.
      Per wig and gown, just believe, e dey come…

  • Reply
    Cassandra Ikegbune
    October 11, 2014 at 9:29 am

    Me , I have that type of man so I’m entirely sure that those type of men exists! So yes, I dey for your back kampe

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 11, 2014 at 7:28 pm

      You see, personal testimony that “that kain man dey”. No need to be tensed up jare, what you believe/expect is what you get. Thank you Cassandra

  • Reply
    October 11, 2014 at 10:11 pm

    Funny how I’m told that I’m too young to realize that kind of man doesn’t exist but God Himself says a man after His heart does exist.

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 12, 2014 at 7:30 am

      Yeah Mobolaji,funny how trusting God for the best which He has even promised us is unrealistic…
      I always say that I want to remain childlike in my faith in God.if growing up will make me lose it then i want no part in that

  • Reply
    Prosper B. Wealth
    October 12, 2014 at 4:35 am

    Hello Frances.

    This is my first time on your blog.

    I really enjoyed your perspective in this post.

    And for the phrase that said, “[God] is still in the business of writing love stories;” that was great insight.

    One other thing I’ll love to add is that many single christian youths are not prepared for the kind of faithful spouse that God wants to give to them.

    God wants the best for His children. And so, it is important that we prepare for the future that He planned for us.

    For example, if God planned for you to get married to a successful millionaire business man, you have to be psychologically and emotionally be prepared to pray for his safety. You have to learn to be happy and faithful without his presence etc.

    The trouble with being unprepared is that you may find yourself struggling in a God ordained marriage that you were not totally prepared for.

    I always say this: “Sex is just one part of the equation.”

    And so preparing yourself only for the sex part of marriage is still partially prepared for your God-given spouse.

    Prepare spiritually (listen to the goodnews on faith, faithfulness and responsibility), physically (remain attractive), emotionally (know when to cry and know when to be strong – in other words – be vulnerable) and intellectually (buy good books and read).

    Funny how I’ve given you ideas for your next 12 blog posts too.

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 12, 2014 at 7:34 am

      Welcome on board Prosper!
      And yes,you have given me an idea for a blog post, will tag you when I write it 🙂
      Your comment tallies with my thoughts and with a post I read yesterday on being a wife..its not just believing and trusting that God has our back, but also doing our best to be moulded in all areas like we need to be… will write it soon,putting my thoughts on comment here will just be too
      Thanks for stopping by

  • Reply
    October 12, 2014 at 4:46 pm

    Abeg don’t be fooled oo my sis… that kain man dey!… infact very plenty! One bad apple those not always mean αℓℓ apples are bad-you know?!

    Just stay in tune with the creator and keep your FAITH alive, its the currency of heaven…”without it you can’t receive from God” I dey always feel you my sis.

    …& thank u for visiting my blog! ☺

  • Reply
    Frances Okoro
    October 13, 2014 at 8:56 am

    Haha Ade! I dey always feel you too…
    #its not that I don’t know that bad apples exist,i just know that the bad apple is not for
    #thats just it.

  • Reply
    1 + The One
    October 13, 2014 at 10:25 am

    Beautiful! My thoughts and beliefs too.. I believe with all my heart that God writes the best stories and I am very expectant at how mine will turn out 🙂 *smiles sheepishly* lol

    Thank you for this reminder dear.. Sometimes one is on a faith-high and sometimes you are like “God are you sure?” lol.. So we certainly need to hear/read this again and again.. Thanks dear xx

    And may I be one of the first to congratulate you on your call-to-bar!! I can see you all dressed up in my mind’s eye.. God will do it in Jesus name xx

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 15, 2014 at 3:56 pm

      I’m super super excited to see what God’s got planned too Ayo. I know it will blow our mind! Hah! It will!

      And it’s sure nice to be reminded time and time again to keep the faith…and thank you for the wishes, amen and amen!

  • Reply
    October 14, 2014 at 4:23 pm

    Thanks frances.I liked the part about getting my relationship straight with God, thats what i’m going to focus on.Thank you so much.

  • Reply
    Frances Okoro
    October 15, 2014 at 3:43 pm

    Thanks for stopping by Marvy..thats certainly something to get in place.our relationship with God even dictates the tone for our relationship with the spouse…
    I pray we all move into greater depths of intimacy with God in Jesus name, amen.
    Again, thank you

  • Reply
    Highly Favored
    October 19, 2014 at 2:45 pm

    I am there with you my sister. I refuse to lower my standards and great expectations. God has BLESSED me with a dream job/career and he will also bless me to be a dream wife and the special gift of my dream husband.

    My mom ran into an old friend of mine recently and she asked my mom if I hadn’t gotten married yet. My mom replied with humor and said she had not found her gold man yet, that man she is looking for has not yet been made… It’s funny but I’m not joking. God will perfect all that concerns me and bring it forth in His due time, not my will Lord but yours be done.

    Thanks for stopping by my blog. I’ve read your comment on the Mr. Milton post. Thank you.

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 19, 2014 at 5:01 pm

      God bless you for your comment highly favoured… even I am encouraged to not lower my standards(which aren’t even overboard by the way)…the only thing different from my standard from the next is that I want what God can readily give to me and I’m waiting to have it.

      Our expectations will not be caught short in Jesus Name, amen.

      And I totally loved the Mr Milton’s post, more especially because it’s real.God help us all to meet needs and people He has placed in our lives in our daily activities…

  • Reply
    October 24, 2014 at 4:03 pm

    Thank You so much for this dear.
    when I keep saying I’m waiting for that kind of man, pips think it’s only Jesus that can be the man. I trust God for the very best.
    Thanks for the reminder that I’m not alone.

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      October 24, 2014 at 7:39 pm

      It feels great to know that i am not alone too Gracie.. that there are people-self respecting daughter’s of god who know what they deserve and what god can give them.
      #our expectations shall not be cut off.

  • Reply
    April 18, 2016 at 7:33 am

    Am Esther from warri,I just discovered ur blog 2days ago.I want 2 encourage singles not 2 give up on their faith 2 God concerning their marital a living testimony of dat kind man dey,wen I was single I almost got frustrated with d kind of men that often approaches me;worldly and in serious men,even when I am a devoted Christian. when I tell pple d kind of man am praying 4,they will tell me am just deceiving myself dat I should go and create my own man.but I neva got discouraged, I waited 4 God ,2 tell d truth it was not easy.finally d man came when I least expected, I wasn’t even thinking about man at dat tym cos I was so engrossed in my career. D kind of man I Neva dreamt existed,God gave me more than what I expected. its was just lyk a dream 2 me,even up till dis minute. my wedding has been fixed this yr.To God be d glory

    • Reply
      Frances Okoro
      April 22, 2016 at 12:57 pm

      Thank you sooo much for encouraging us with your testimony Esther.
      God sure rewards those who wait upn Him, never fails.
      It might not be at our own time/fit what we thought but God gives the best gifts.

      Praying you and your husband’s home to be lights in God’s kingdom.
      May your kids be mighty upon the earth and may the testimony of God’s goodness never depart from your midst in Jesus name, amen.
      May helpers and provision also flow in for your wedding. May you both not lack. Divine provision God will pour upon you both in Jesus name, amen!


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