I’m Thinking About Henry My Love Situationship Today..

I’m thinking about henry today…

For some reason, I’m thinking about this guy I had a “situationship” with from nine/ten years ago.

I had blogged about it here at Lessons from when I almost dated an engaged man – https://www.hephzibahfrances.com/lessons-from-when-i-almost-dated-an-engaged-man/

The sad news is he is actually dead now; he died in year 2015 but for some reason my mind has been drifting over to him. For what reason I am not sure.

I had met Henry as a fellow student at Nigerian Law School Lagos campus. He was very kind to me and genuinely liked me too. One thing led to another and we began to develop feelings for one another. Feelings we couldn’t admit but they were there anyway. I remember speaking to two friends who caught it and told me smiling “you like Henry”. I was like “what, no!” But I did like him and it took God to pull me out of it. Those weren’t easy days.

I was going to Redeem camp one night when God said to cut ties with him. I argued and even cried, but why Lord? We are just friends. I tried to rationalise our relationship. You see, Henry was engaged when we had this friendship. We were really in a mess we were refusing to admit to ourselves. I tried to tell me we can’t be friends for now but he kind of found a way to make me continue speaking with him. We used to spend all our time together after classes. The day I saw I had fallen for this guy was a particular day when I saw him with a lady just talking and laughing when we were supposed to meet up. Gosh. Jealousy rose from deep within me. And as I stood there quizzing him on this, I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit say to me “and you say you are just friends”. I saw I had fallen in love with this guy and I had to get out FAST. I am a Christian and he is engaged. How did I get into this situation?

My roommate had attempted to speak in parables to me one time saying “what you don’t want others to do to you don’t do to others”. She was talking about Henry being engaged and us being so close but I didn’t listen. In my mind “we are just friends”. But now the Holy Ghost had opened up my heart to me, dare I go on my own way of denial?

And thus began three months of learning fo detoxify my system of this guy I had fallen in love with…

In all these “situation” God spoke to me clearly when I asked “why are you having me disengage from this guy?”

He said, “I can’t give your heart to another of its already with someone else”.

I desired a real relationship, even though at this time I was broken and didn’t want a man. I just wanted to heal. But the long term goal was that I wanted God to give me a man who would love me like Christ loved the church. That man hadn’t come yet but I needed to be free for when God would send this man to me. I needed to be available so when God sends him I’m ready to enter into that relationship with that man. And if my heart is already with someone else, there was no way God could orchestrate this relationship. I wasn’t free to explore that relationship. This is how some of us are our own barriers to the godly relationships God wants to bless us with.

I posted a video this year titled “whatever you do this year, please don’t date the counterfeit”. You can watch it here

The deal with dating the counterfeit is that you are engaged in the wrong thing so God can’t give you the right one. God needs you free to be able to place your heart in another’s hands.

And oh by the way, if you are wondering “but how does someone get into situationships like the one I shared with Henry above?”

Even bible believing Christians who love God? ??‍♂️ I’d say situationships is what happens when you spend a lot of time with someone, talking to them daily, doing almost everything with them, even if you are praying.. then the feelings begin to crop up. You both are feeling one another but yet things aren’t defined. He hasn’t asked for something more and you aren’t sure of what’s going on but your emotions are catching up on fire and all what not. Already saying I love yous etc. You know something is there. Define things. Ask him if he isn’t saying anything so your life can be uncomplicated and free of these situationships. These things can turn a person’s head upside down! And remember, God can’t give your heart to another when it’s with someone else. And if it be with the wrong someone else or a person who does not want to commit, you better know now so you can free your life from these complications and move to what next God has for you. A word is enough for the wise.

And the above said, I welcome us all to year 2023 on Hephzibah Frances blog! My goodness! It’s been months since I wrote on this blog. Show me some love by commenting below and who knows? God will help us make at least regular weekly posts this year. Amen? Amen!

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And see you next time on here. Maybe I’d even share some blog schedule for the year as I used to do here. I’m trusting God to help me because my responsibilities are much more than I ever had before when I used to be regular with the blog but God help me!