#Purposeful Living Love&Relationships

Can We Make This Month Of Love Different?

I’ve being planning to write this post for like ever. Inspiration comes while I am in the bathroom and goes when I rush off for class with the law textbooks till 4pm and of course I just have to steal some sleep after that before group meeting at 6pm and reading again….You know how it goes….bla bla bla… Anyhoos, how have you guys been? I am presuming you all are splendidly awesome because that makes me feel better…. Ehen, I heard Valentine’s Day is this Friday o, hian!Val's day 2013...

Val’s day 2013

The matter ehn, I haven’t been on BBM but I know that Facebook has been awash with the boyfriend/girlfriend and this gift and that, including the plans to break up…

val breakup

I spoke to a friend recently about something I am working on for February 15th. In the course of our discussion she told me her mum died when she was 3years old and she had been through a lot because of that and the wheels in my head just started turning: do you know that so many like her abound? Not only in orphanages but maybe even that your neighbour’s house girl you see each day on your way to work, that little girl you buy bottled water from at the shop down the road… You see them every day but have you stopped for a second to imagine the joy these people will derive from as little as a smile from your lips? Your mum helped you get your first bra and got you pads when aunty flo came for the first time and you take it for granted… do you know that others practically weep for want of that ‘luxury’ you take for granted? You’ve already booked a flight ticket and reserved a table at a fab restaurant for your darling and yourself but do you know that there are others who’ll break an arm and leg in appreciation to you for just 500 naira you give to them?kindness

We see ourselves almost every day, worship in the same church but are we really going to spend the day of love ONLY within ourselves? Shouldn’t the light from us spread farther than our ‘the one’? Wouldn’t it be better if along with your hot date night you also plan a visit to the hospital to see the sick together, to give, pray and spend time with others in need of those smiles you share only between yourselves? That doesn’t stop you from having your date night like you planned(that’s what I would do if I were with my the one)…

Oh ye single lady planning to just have sex with Chike on February 14th because you are lonely, take heed so the below doesn’t happen to you o.


Instead of pinning and crying for your ‘the one’ to arrive, don’t you think lots of the less privileged would be gratefullll to receive a fraction of the love you are currently saving for only him/her’?

Well well,, I promised to share what valentine means to me and by God, the above is how I feel it should be spent-at least a greater part of it…Can we all dare to celebrate Valentine’s day and indeed this month of love a little different from what we are used to? Can we please let the love transcend beyond us and our ‘the ones’ to others direly in need of it? Can we?


And if you are still confused as to what to do, here’s an inkling, I and my friends/people interested from NLS Lagos will be spending February 15th at Modupe Cole home for kids with low IQ at Yaba opposite Pako bus top and more than the contributions, we are trusting God that our presence will make a difference and touch lives for good. I actually wanted to do it like a Law School students thing but if you are led to, you can join us or contribute if you can, of course my email is up there on my ‘about me page’, hit me up and let’s talk… but more than this, you can do same wherever you are, you may not go to an orphanage/old people’s home/hospital/prisons/slums but just spread forth the love to others other than your better half, look around you, look at that little boy with a tray of pure water on his head while his mates are at school, look at that madam akara you patronize every night, look at  those that will kneel and prostrate for just a little show of kindness from you, they abound.

God bless us all as we strive to not just let His love shine through us for February 14th and this month alone but may His love come to stay in our hearts, spreading to others around us forever…

share a smile

And yes! I’ve not forgotten o, my first blog giveaway!!! I am not all deep thinker ish o, I do like the normal ‘the one’ love too so after the many brain cracking as to what my giveaway question will be, I thought it should be one that lets you guys know that I have blood flowing through my veins and I can like/love one guy too and dispel all thoughts of Margaret Thatcher ish going on in the minds of my friends…hehehe (surprised?)(I do love Margaret Thatcher though but I digress)

fine guveaway

So, the question is how old was I when I had my verrrry first crush/when the thought entered my head that “wait o, I have emotions and I can love oo”…You know when I had my very first contact with this thing called love (according to my small brain then). Simply put,, how old was I when I fell in love for the first time??? Let the answers start rolling in! The giveaway is a ticket to see a movie in Silverbird cinema if you are in Lagos, or its equivalent in recharge card if you aren’t in Lagos/ if you prefer that and you can also enter for it if you aren’t in Nigeria(like yours truly) I will send it to any relative or friend that you want… Only two persons can win sha o. I am pained that it’s just going to be two winners but greater things ahead yeah? Yes!

Oya please comment with your answer and kindly share this post on twitter, Facebook et al, I want everyone who’s ever read even just one post on my blog to get a chance at this ‘small’ giveaway. I mega appreciate you all. Thank you o, please hit the share button….

Have a love filled week/month that will transcend beyond the love you show to ONLY your ‘the one’.

With plentyyyyy love, Frances.From NLS with love...

From NLS with love…

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  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 12:29 am

    Great idea Frances! I am inspired already. Praise God for this thoughtfulness!

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 12:53 am

      Thank you Aunty Ugochi, I am also grateful to God for thoughtful words in due seasons..thanks ma

  • Reply
    Missy Tee
    February 10, 2014 at 12:42 am

    Awwwww I would have loved to go for the Feb 15 visit but too far away from Lag. at the mo’. 🙁 God bless your heart for doing this Frances.
    You are right though, Valentine’s should be shared.

    You were probably 12 at the time.

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 12:48 am

      Good news is Missy Tee, you can do this wherever you are and not necessarily with something grand;could be love shown to that little boy you see each day that you knows needs some godly sugar love…and 12? ok oooo,heh…

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 12:55 am

    Fabulous! This giveaway dimension is laudable! Way to go girl!!!

    … if love from its original source&nature is characterized by its desire to inspire and contribute to better lives, why not celebrate& prioritize our love walk beyond a certain date or partner/individual?
    Bless your heart Frances! Love outcreaches do make a difference.

    Keep shining&soaring! No limits ma’am.

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 8:55 am

      “No limits ma’am!” Yes, definitely none Lizzie.
      And your comment just spurred me on again to let Christ’s love through me(us)be celebrated beyond certain people/individuals.*hugs* God bless you plenty..
      Err,you lauded the blog giveaway but didn’t enter your answer o, *rolling eyes* I wonder why all my friends are leaving it for others.. Ok o.lol

  • Reply
    Yours Truly
    February 10, 2014 at 3:12 am

    Lol @ oh ye single lady planning to just have sex with Chike on February 14th – that one really cracked me up. Valentines’ day is all about spreading the love – I’m working on the 14th, and that’s a perfect opportunity to spread some love – Will help nurse my patients’ back to health. Frances, may the good Lord keep blessing you – young and accomplished! Please, don’t stop affecting people positively. You were 15 when you fell in love for the first time. Hope I guessed right?


    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 8:59 am

      Yours truly, it may not be chike the babe is planning to have sex with o, maybe others with his own name, tis serious. Someone told me a story of a girl that did it on Vals day for the first time and that was how the belle came, the word needs to be spread,some maybe confused and pressured,thus just want to go ahead with it. God help us..
      And woah! Fine Nurse! You have the perfect environment to spread the love on that day and for everyday you live, God bless you plenty plenty for me dear,I appreciate your kind words.
      And 15? Is that really your final answer? Hmm, we’ll see…

  • Reply
    1 + The One
    February 10, 2014 at 9:21 am

    LOVE this! You have inspired me to want to do love differently this month. Like you said, rather than pining for ‘the one’, I would rather spend it doing something for someone.. More of God’s grace for you and your friends. He who gives to the poor lends to God xxx
    Oh and with the prize giveaway, I’m guessing 14yrs old.. 🙂 xx

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 7:39 pm

      Thanks much 1+the one, yes, more grace for us all,amen..
      And 14years? Heheheh, *fingers crossed*

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 10:45 am

    Really touched by ur words sisi
    actually, with your kinda person~ i believe you knew the word love not neccessarily with “ur mr cutie or heart rob” but with everyone you see around you.
    i can say you started expressin love when you could understand its concept n ways of expressing it. It could be as tender as possible but love with “ur mr cutie”, i could say 15 years old.

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 7:42 pm

      Thank you Ruth, I am also amazed by your kind of person too, by your zeal to be more and do more..
      And 15years? Eku ise o,thank you.

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 11:10 am

    Very nice and considerate way to spend the Val. You know, sometimes we rush through the hustle&bustle of everyday life overlooking the ‘little people’ who have been made little by a lack of economic significance, disease, disability & voicelessness. And i believe like you rightly said, even a little kindness/help would surely do much to bring sunlight into their gloomy existence & make them feel that they are part of the society & can still achieve their dreams, may even draw a tear.
    I have heard of places where they thank you everyday for a #500 naira gift (yeah!).
    Like Mother Theresa said, when you help the less privileged, each of your five fingers echo Jesus words; “You did it to me”.

    P.S: i think you were 17 about turning 18 but still 17!

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 11:34 am

    This your question ehn… Great post dear.

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 7:47 pm

      Hehe the question get as e be? You nor drop answer o.
      Thank you for stopping by Tomiwa.

      • Reply
        February 10, 2014 at 8:05 pm

        As I no sabi answer nko. I’m watching and waiting.

      • Reply
        February 13, 2014 at 8:53 pm

        hehehehhe, as I am waiting too cuz I nor sure say I know too o.

  • Reply
    Oghenero Ezaza
    February 10, 2014 at 7:26 pm


  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 7:45 pm

    Thank you Emmytim for leaving Mother Theresa’s words on here, tis the truth and deeply resonates..indeed,all kindness shown is done to Jesus himself.
    And your answer be like two age o, but 17 yeah? We wee see if you are right.*smiles*

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 8:02 pm

    great post my dear sis.
    keep the flag flying.


  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 10:00 pm

    I LOOOOOOOOOVE this idea! My guess is that you were 8yrs old.

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 10:15 pm

      And I Looooooooooooove the fact that you came on here NW! But I couldn’t help laughing here at the 8years old oo, but you may be right sha. We’ll see if you are*big grin*…

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 10:30 pm

    Why didn’t I come up wt this idea when I was single? Busy pining. Mtcheww.

    • Reply
      February 10, 2014 at 11:27 pm

      Dr N, you just cracked me up real good. But all’s good, you are still blessing us in your married state, I know I’ve gleaned priceless wisdom for your writings..

  • Reply
    February 10, 2014 at 11:43 pm

    Love is the highest calling and the most acceptable sacrifice. I agree with Lizzie ,we should share love beyond a particular date. Its human to be selfish and think of just ourselves but when we start extending love to others without expecting anything in return,God is pleased.

    God bless u bigly Frances,I pray your visit to those children will change the course of their destiny.

    Now to the giveaway, Frances you know this is not fair o! your first crush? haba! How am I going to know when I had my first crush when I was nine. Don’t blame me o! D boy was very fine and brilliant. lol
    My guess: probably when you were 14 or 15*winks*

    • Reply
      February 11, 2014 at 9:08 pm

      Amen and amen Tosin, I am really praying that God love will shine through us that day…
      Ehen! You were crushing on someone when you were nine? Brilliant boy yeah? I nor blame you at all.Heheh..
      Your answer’s sitting on the fence o, please come back and chose one, nor confuse my head. I want you to win sef,I almost wrote it in the post.come back and chose one age.*smiles*

  • Reply
    February 11, 2014 at 1:09 pm

    I enjoyed reading this! Great plans for Val’s day.
    There’s truly nothing more fulfilling than putting a smile on the face of other people especially people who can never repay u in anyway.
    Yiiiipppeee!!!!! I like giveaways!
    As for the crush thing, my guess would be 18-19.
    Cos that’s probably when I had my first crush (don’t laff) 🙂 .

    • Reply
      February 11, 2014 at 9:10 pm

      I totally agree with your femmetotale, the selfless kinda love is always the best…
      You said I shouldn’t laugh? I don burst laugh here already. We’ll soon know if I had my first crush same time as you did..hmmm.

  • Reply
    February 11, 2014 at 4:27 pm

    Loved this post. A refreshing look at Vals day. It shows it should be about love in it’s totality; not just romantic love.

  • Reply
    February 11, 2014 at 6:37 pm

    hmmmm,….my answer isssssssssssssss 12yrs old.
    I love this post…..insightful as always.
    This is really you saying ur ready for greater this year ooh…u nor even wan gree 4 anybody,….giveaway/vals love visit to the kids……God’s actually training you in Godliness.and you are acting on them…I know I will definitely hear a great testimony from you by the end of next quarter. God bless you love,..muah..love u

    • Reply
      February 11, 2014 at 9:15 pm

      Ah Hannah! You sabi that our E hug shey? That’s what your comment makes me wanna give to you right now now!
      God promised us “greater” abi? I will follow,case closed.
      12 years old? 12years old? 12 years old? Shebi you join those wey dey think say I was very young? Why can’t you guess that I have NEVER crushed on any one? Holy bebe things? Looools..we’ll see if you are right.
      #plenty love babes!

      • Reply
        February 11, 2014 at 9:30 pm

        lol,….that E hug is coming to u nw my babe…..Me I know sey u get crush,…u nor fit hide under our christian sister wrapper,..lol
        I just have to be right ooh,…u better make me right,..I must win ooh….heheheh

    • Reply
      February 12, 2014 at 6:47 am

      lmaoooo.Hannah! Christian sis wrapper??? loool. ok o, I want you to win too, we shall soon see.#fingers crossed

  • Reply
    cassandra ikegbune
    February 11, 2014 at 8:04 pm

    Great idea!! I might join in (if my school allows me get off on time). been meaning to do something like this for a while now

    • Reply
      February 11, 2014 at 9:16 pm

      Great great great Cassandra! Will be glad if you can make it, having someone other than the lawyers to be in there would also make senses!
      Its by 10am,will hit you a mail to make things clearer incase you can indeed make it..*smiles*

  • Reply
    February 12, 2014 at 9:58 am

    To answer your question, you were old enough. Lol 😛

    You raised solid points. I’ve never understood the idea of building castles in the air with a man you most certainly know can’t be yours. Why pin and yearn for him on vals day? Abeg let the love of God shine through jare!

    • Reply
      February 12, 2014 at 10:44 pm

      I just wanna click on the like on your comment Maggielola, I wish there was one. spot on!

  • Reply
    February 13, 2014 at 12:06 am

    Really thoughtful of you dear, love to evry1 around us shld be a daily thing not jst on feb 14. Am gueSsing ur first love experience was @ 15

    • Reply
      February 13, 2014 at 12:13 am

      Exactly Suzanne, it should spread forth beyond feb 14th…
      and 15 seems to be the popular general consensus here o, well well, we shall see if its right sha, soon soon…

  • Reply
    February 13, 2014 at 6:52 pm

    I got this from Nathaniel Bassey’s Page on facebook and coupled with yours above, you couldn’t have said it better!

    Come 14th February, a loveless world would celebrate LUST, in the name of LOVE. To them, the gust of testosterone and estrogen surging through the male and female body, leading to wild sex drives and uncontrolled libido, is LOVE. And as a result, sexual immorality would be at it’s peak that day and days preceding and even after it.

    Billions of dollars in income and profit would be raked in from sales of goods and services world over. Corporate bodies and businesses smart enough to seize the moment would engineer, psychologically, the appetites and desires of consumers to spend using subtle and aggressive marketing techniques, all in the name of “LOVE”

    But as Christians, called to be salt and light in a fallen world, we cannot join the rave, rather we must seek the Lord to save, by the power of the Holy Spirit, men and women on the path of hell and eternal damnation, as we seize the opportunity to introduce Christ Jesus – LOVE personified – to those we come in contact with that day. Praying and believing that every spiritually blind and lost soul will encounter the love of Christ which passes knowledge and that which truly fills and satisfies in Jesus’ mighty name. Amen.

    Secondly, me I no know the age where you begin look say you dey feel one kind..lol, and so let me just pass this giveaway by. but you sef, which kind of algebraic question is this? me i no like am oo…

    And may the love of Christ shine through us all always! kisses

    • Reply
      February 13, 2014 at 7:06 pm

      Thank you for sharing that here glowing scenes.
      #divine wisdom. I am grateful..

      But the question nor hard naaa,tis simple guess, 2years sef.lol
      Happy Valentine. Spread forth the love of Christ,let it shine brightly..

    • Reply
      February 13, 2014 at 7:44 pm

      Wowzer!!! Frances, this is the point where you (using your legal acumen) request a custom-made “Like” button from WordPress for Glowingscene’s comment.

      My word!

      • Reply
        February 13, 2014 at 9:01 pm

        I just got the email with the words glowing scenes wrote here from my church again, Minister Nathaniel couldn’t be right(er) 3divine wisdom + eshe o glowing scenes for sharing it here…
        Lizzie, I agree, its about time WordPress brings in the like buttons on comments, we needs it, moreso for comments like yours that are always on point!
        And as soon as I get full certification as a Legal Practitioner come November by God’s grace, word press will hear from moi. let me get the full backing first. loool

      • Reply
        February 14, 2014 at 7:07 pm

        this ebun just knows how to make someone’s head swell. LOOL, abeg oo…**grinning and blushing.** thank u! Na nathaniel write am o and me I just helped him share.

    • Reply
      February 14, 2014 at 11:48 pm

      and your sharing come bless lives so na. thank you plenty again

  • Reply
    February 13, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    This post, I like. Thank God for teenage years spent with my head in books so I never caught the Val bug.

    I wish I was in Lag already woulda loved to join you. Told someone about it sha.

    For the giveaway, my answers are: 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21. 😀

    • Reply
      February 13, 2014 at 9:04 pm

      And that’s something you could do right there on val’s day too Enajyte, thank God its a school day, you could spread the word in schools to little girls on whats important, for them not to get their heads in a roll cuz of the val thingy, its all a part of spreading the love and helping them make right choices like you did..
      and see your loooong answer! phew!!! kai! issorite.

      • Reply
        February 14, 2014 at 4:41 am

        I am actually. Going to a girls’ boarding school. It’d be fun.

      • Reply
        February 14, 2014 at 6:44 am

        it would definitely be fun, I can see it in my mind’s eye already. God bless you as you bless lives. *cheers.*smiles

  • Reply
    Pink, Love and Valentine’s | Femmetotale
    February 14, 2014 at 11:22 am

    […] Everyone is getting involved and whether you believe in the idea of having a day set aside by the world to celebrate love or not the fact is that Valentine’s day has come to stay. There… I’ve said it. What was all the rambling about, you ask! Today is all about love. I’ve seen and read so much about Valentine’s day; ways to make your day special, reasons why it shouldn’t be celebrated, what to do, what to wear, how to ‘wow him’, how to make it your last valentine without a ring on your finger, how to know if you’re the special one on valentine (of course you don’t need a soothsayer to tell you where you stand if you call and his phone is switched off all day) and I’ve seen crazy BBM’s about valentine :)  Bloggers are blogging it and I particularly enjoyed imperfectly perfect’s post on valentine. Check it out here. […]

  • Reply
    February 14, 2014 at 2:11 pm

    Hiii! I was referred here by Enajyte. I really would love to be a part of this. Could you giveme any more information? I tried mailing you.. That didn’t work I guess. Be blessed.

    • Reply
      February 14, 2014 at 11:51 pm

      Mail sent now with info, so sorry for the late reply, I hope it does get to you on time….

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