Frances's Love Letters Love&Relationships

All Is Well That Ends In Marriage?

No. Not true.

 

Shebi he married you na? What if he dinnor marry you nko?

 

As a young girl I used to think that marriage was all in all. Don’t blame it on
me; blame it on the society. So when I started playing with boys deals by calling guys on newspaper, I thought that I was doing well as long as they said that they would marry me.
And that was okay for me for a while.

After the first guy slapped me and commanded me to open my legs for sex, I still didn’t feel bad since he said he would marry me. I only felt terrible when he wasn’t picking my calls. I was ready to endure the abuse (which became not abuse in my eyes) simply because he said he would “marry me”.

When I committed previous abortions too, I still didn’t feel like anything was amiss because the guy said he would marry me and one of my greatest struggles with leaving that relationship was thinking, who would marry me now?

You see, my mind was so twisted I believed that all was good as long as this guy promised marriage and the relationship continued.

And then I became born again and the whole thing shifted on its head. I realized how wrong I was.

I saw how God was actually saving me from disaster by ENSURING that those previous relationships had never ended in marriage.

Praise break: glory, hallelujah!!

I saw how not only would my marriage have ended up in disaster; but I would have been building on NOTHING.

The whole “all’s well that ends in marriage” was deeper than I thought.

“If the foundations are destroyed, What can the righteous do?”
-Psalms 11:3 NKJV

God began to show me that no it is not well for a relationship to end in marriage; every relationship started on a wrong foundation is a disaster waiting to happen.

What are wrong foundations?

Every foundation not laid on the foundation of Christ and His word is a hopeless case.

“Therefore whoever hears these sayings of Mine, and does them, I will liken him to a wise man who built his house on the rock: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it did not fall, for it was founded on the rock.
“But everyone who hears these sayings of Mine, and does not do them, will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand: and the rain descended, the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house; and it fell. And great was its fall.”
Matthew 7:24‭-‬27 NKJV

Jesus actually likened every man who doesn’t build his house on the rock of God’s as a foolish man.

Why do we do it?

Why do we build our houses on sand and expect them to stand just because it ended in “marriage?”

No..that house and marriage is a target for a great fall!

I didn’t say it. Jesus said it!

And so I am always so scared to hear ladies say that “at least he will marry me”.

Oh sis, I used to be like you till I realized and recognised the magnitude of beginning everything I do on the right foundation the foundation of Christ ans His word.

What can make for a faulty foundation?

A foundation of premarital sex is a wrong foundation.

Building on lust and passion is a wrong foundation.

Building on what your physical eyes can see is a wrong foundation.

Only the foundation of the Lord Jesus Christ and His word is a solid foundation – Only that kind of home would stand the test of time… only that kind of home can be an instrument of great work in the Lord’s hands.

Some might argue: but we see other homes where the men and women had sex before marriage stand and stay for years… well my answer is that it depends on whose lenses you are looking through.

In the eyes of the world they may have something going but in the eyes of God? Not so much.

Gathering followers on earth and useless for eternity.

Read Marriage in light of eternity.

 

“Nevertheless the solid foundation of God stands, having this seal: “The Lord knows those who are His,” and, “Let everyone who names the name of Christ depart from iniquity.”
II Timothy 2:19 NKJV

What can a person who has already made mistake do then?

Ask for mercy.

The issue with foundations is that no amount of prayer can help you.

Ever seen couples who go for counselling after counselling… try to start attending church together…fast and pray and try to do religious things together and still it’s not working?

God is not an addendum to be added to your equation. He is the base and without Him as a base, nothing else stands.

A pastor cannot even help you go on 40 days fast. When a foundation is destroyed by being set upon sand, and you build upon that sand, the consequent effect is a crash.

But you can ask for mercy.

“And the Lord said, “I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the Lord , in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion.”
Exodus 33:19 NIV

Prayer:
Father I come to you in humility. Lord I ask for your mercy. I have built with straw and I have built with sand. Please uproot and overhaul the wrong foundations of my life, my relationships and my marriage. Rebuild me again Lord. Rebuild me with the word of the Lord. Please Lord. Rebuild me again, with the word of the Lord..teach me..mold me..teach me everyday. Show me how to walk in you. Show me how to do relationships in your way.
May my marriage be built upon the rock in Jesus name, amen.

Please feel free to email me at okorofrances@gmail.com if you need to talk.

Shalom.

 

___________________________________________

 NEWS:

Do you have my books “PRAYERS FOR YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND and PRAYERS FOR YOUR FUTURE SEED?

Hard and soft copies are available.

Email okorofrances@gmail.com for yours.

Download PRAYERS FOR YOUR FUTURE SEED FREE sneak-peek copy here

 

And watch the prayers for your future seed series on YouTube here

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